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If you look up and down many of today’s football rosters, you are bound to find some interesting names. Some of those names are great on their own, others if combined with a phrase may be clever or hilarious, a-la ESPN’s Chris Berman. Here is our compilation of the best names in the conference today.
Arizona
Jake Glatting “Gun” - P
Isaiah “Shaft” Hayes - DB
Jake “Gold” Laudenslager - RB
Isaiah “Forever” Strong - DB
Laythe “Super” Freikh - OL
Gerhard “Who’s Bringing” De Beer - OL
Arizona State
Tashon “It’s Not a” Smallwood - DL
Dougladson “Not So” Subtyl - DL
Jojo Wicker “Chair”- DL
Koron “Get” Krump - LB
Tyson “Mercury” Rising - OL
Jesse “Don’t Date Your” Cozens - OL
Michael “Don’t Fall a” Sleep-Dalton - P
California
Devonte “I Live For Fourth” Downs - LB
James Looney “Tunes” - DL
Evan “First Blood” Rambo - DB
Quentin “Sweet” Tartabull - DB
Evan “Leave It to” Weaver - LB
Poutasi Poutasi “the Lineman So Nice They Named Him Twice” - OL
Colorado
Derrion “the Last” Rakestraw - WR
Bryce Bobo “the Clown” - WR
Juwann “I Want to Be” Winfree - WR
Chris “Honey” Graham - K
Pookie “Monster” Maka - LB
“I’ve Got a Fever, and the Only Cure Is” Mo Bandi - OL
Jonathan “Woodchuck” Huckins - OL
Oregon
Malik “Leave It or” Lovette - WR
Brady “Cool” Breeze - DB
Troy “Tie” Dye - LB
Brenden “I Ride My Skateboard to” Schooler - DB
“T” Rex Manu - DL
Oregon State
Landry “Bring the” Payne - DB
Wesley “Brought the” Payne - LB
Timmy “and the Lords of the Underworld” Hernandez - WR
Ryan “Wrecking” Nall - RB
Thor “Hammer” Katoa - LB
Phillip Napoleon “Dynamite” - DL
Tuli “Wet” Wily-Matagi
Stanford
Harry “Use the” Schwarts - WR
Bobby “Okra” Okereke - LB
Bryce “Guy” Love - RB
Trevor “Rise to New” Speights - RB
“Little” Bo Peek - DL
Scooter “Sasha” Harrington - TE
UCLA
“Just” Soso Jamabo - RB
“I’ve got” Josh Woods - LB
Josh “Stop and Smell the” Rosen - QB
Bolu “You Better” Olorunfunmi - RB
John “My Parents Are Original” Johnson - DB
Mossi “Oak” Johnson - WR
Scott Quessenberry “Pie” - OL
“I’m the” Boss Tagaloa - DL
USC
Marvel “Show and” Tell III - DB
Jamel “I’m Not a” Cook - DB
Davonte “Straight Outta the” Nunnery - DB
Toa “From Dusk til” Lobendahn - OL
Kenny “Deuce” Bigelow “Male Gigolo” Jr. - DL
Utah
Boobie “Tee-Hee” Hobbs - DB
Nygel “Hail to the” King - DB
Pita “Bread” Tonga - DL
Washington
Jake “Shotgun” Browning - QB
DJ “Should of Gone to OSU” Beavers - LB
Benning “You Say Potato, I say” Potoa’e - LB
Ben “Sub-Zero” Burr-Kirven - LB
Washington State
Hercules “Son of Zeus” Mata’afa - DL
Marcellus Pippins “Ain’t Easy” - DB
Danny Bender “Bending Rodriguez” - DL
Taylor “For Your” Comfort - DL
“Peachy” Keenan King - OL
Garret “Sweep the Leg” McBroom - DL
Did we miss any? If so, please share in the comments. We still got a couple months before the kickoff of football season!